Series Studies

A Cynics Search for the Secrets of Life: Life’s Lessons from the Book of Ecclesiastes
(3 Weeks Series)

In this brief three-week study, class participants will be introduced to several highlights of the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes. Although the book has an overall negative tone, Ecclesiastes also points to several life-giving insights. The study includes the following three lessons:

Lesson 1: Avoid the Wrong Paths (Eccl. 2:1–11)
Lesson 2: Live Fully in the Present Moment (Eccl. 9:3–10)
Lesson 3: Prioritize Relationships (Eccl. 4:7–12)

This series includes reflections on each passage, followed by a class discussion guide, as you can see below.

Lesson 1 – Avoid the Wrong Paths
Ecclesiastes 2:1–11

Many of you are familiar with Gary Larson. Before he retired, Gary Larson was the creator of the bizarre cartoon series, The Far Side. If you are familiar with Larson’s cartoons, you know he loves to depict animals with human characteristics. He especially loves cows. One of my favorite Far Side cartoons depicts an affluent cow wearing fine jewelry and drinking a cocktail. She tells her husband, “Wendell, I’m not content.”

That cartoon reminds me of the book of Ecclesiastes. In spite of great affluence, wisdom, status, and power, the writer of Ecclesiastes was not content, but he desperately wanted to be. More than anything else, he wanted to live a meaningful life. He engaged in a lifelong quest for the secrets of a good life and recorded his journey in this book. Over the next three weeks we will review highlights from that journey.

If you are familiar with the book of Ecclesiastes, then you know it’s not a positive book. Instead, it’s mostly cynical and negative. However, in the midst of pessimism, Ecclesiastes shares some extremely positive, life-giving insights. In the end Ecclesiastes discovers some of life’s secrets, and shares them with his readers. However, before telling us how to live a good life, he first tells us how NOT to live a good life, which is the focus of this lesson.

Ecclesiastes begins his book with three popular but ultimately dead-end paths people often travel in their quest for a good life. The writer of Ecclesiastes spent most of his adult life walking down these three paths. However, they did not satisfy him, so he warns his readers not to follow his example. If we’ll heed Ecclesiastes’s warning, we can avoid a lot of unnecessary pain and wasted time. In this lesson we’ll review three life paths that may look promising in the beginning, but in the end they only disappoint.

The Path of Pleasure

The first path can be called the path of pleasure. We see that in the following text:

“I said to myself, ‘Come now, I will make a test of pleasure; enjoy yourself.’ . . . I searched with my mind how to cheer my body with wine. . . . I got singers, both men and women, and delights of the flesh, and many concubines. . . . Whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them; I kept my heart from no pleasure” (2:1, 3, 8, 10 NRSV).

In his quest for contentment, the writer of Ecclesiastes looked to numerous forms of pleasure. For example, he indulged in wine, music, and women. Today people still turn to pleasure to find contentment. And they still look to wine, music, and women—and a host of other things. Of course, some pleasures—like drug and alcohol abuse, gambling, pornography, and adulterous affairs—are destructive. Other pleasures—like sports, vacations, movies, and concerts—can be fun and wholesome. We all need diversions and fun. But if all we have is another vacation to plan, or another football game, or another movie to watch, or another Broadway play to attend—if that’s all we have, we will never be satisfied. While wholesome pleasures can be positive and healthy, pleasure is not the ultimate meaning of life. As the writer of Ecclesiastes said sarcastically, “I said of . . . pleasure, ‘What use is it?’” (2:2 NRSV). Pleasure, by itself, is not enough. Since pleasure did not satisfy his deep longing for contentment, he tried a second path.

The Path of Possessions

The second path can be called the path of possessions, which we see in the following text:

“I also had great possessions of herds and flocks, more than any who had been before me in Jerusalem. I also gathered for myself silver and gold and the treasure of kings” (2:7–8).

In America, accumulating possessions is a popular path for finding contentment. Somehow we believe that acquiring more things will add meaning to our lives. We think, If I can just get a bigger house, or a newer car, or a home theater system, or a bigger stock portfolio, then I’ll be happy. But the path of possessions doesn’t work.

For example, psychologists have long studied contentment levels among nations. Forty years ago Americans were the most contented people on earth. Since then, we have raised the standard of living in this country in amazing ways. We are the most affluent people on earth. We live in huge houses, drive high-quality cars, have TVs and computers in every room, own closets full of clothes, and have every electronic gadget imaginable. But recent studies have revealed that Americans are no longer the most contented nation on earth. In spite of all the stuff we’ve purchased, America has fallen from the most contented nation in the world to the twenty-third most contented nation. In spite of all our consumption and the environmental damage it took to produce it, we are less satisfied with life, not more. Having lots of possessions does not lead to contentment. No matter how much stuff we get, contentment remains elusive.

I’m not naive about money. We are economic creatures and need at least some possessions. Nobody can live a quality life without having basic needs met. But once our basic needs are met, more stuff will not satisfy the deep longing in our souls for meaning and satisfaction. The idea that more stuff buys happiness is an American myth. It just doesn’t work.

The writer of Ecclesiastes learned that. He said of all his possessions, “Everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind” (Eccl. 2:11 NIV). Later, in chapter 5, he adds, “Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income” (5:10 NIV). Neither pleasure nor possessions satisfied Ecclesiastes’s desire for purpose, meaning, happiness, and contentment, so he tried a third path.

The Path of Production

The third path can be called the path of production, as we see in the following text:

“I made great works. . . . I became great and surpassed all who were before me in Jerusalem” (2:4, 9 NRSV).

Since pleasure and possessions did not bring him contentment, Ecclesiastes looked to his career, to his successes, to his accomplishments. He said, “I made great works.” Production is probably the most popular path people in America follow to find contentment. Americans constantly try to find meaning and happiness through their work. But career production is way overrated. It’s not the secret of life. As the well-known quote says, “Nobody ever said on their deathbed, ‘I wish I had spent more time at the office.’”

Ecclesiastes learned that truth. He put incredible energy into the path of production. He made it to the top. He produced. He was successful. But all that success did not give him the purpose and meaning and contentment he was seeking. In one of the saddest verses in all the Bible, he said, “When I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun” (v. 11 NIV).

I once visited a successful businessman at the hospital. He was recovering from serious heart surgery. He told me that he had invested his entire adult life into building his business. He said, “I sacrificed my marriage for this business. I sacrificed my relationship with my children for this business. I even sacrificed my heath for this business.” After a long moment of silence, he said, “It wasn’t worth it.” This man, like the man of Ecclesiastes, finally realized that career production is not the secret of life.

Late in his life the writer of Ecclesiastes realized that the three paths he had spent most of his life traveling—the path of pleasure, the path of possessions, and the path of production—were ultimately bankrupt. They could not satisfy, they could not offer contentment. Each path promised far more than it could deliver.

Don’t misunderstand what I’m saying today. I’m not saying that these three things are unimportant—because they are. Everyone needs some pleasure in life. Everyone needs at least some possessions. And everyone needs to be productive in some way; we all need to work. These three paths are all important, but they are not ultimate; they are not the secrets of life.

The experiences of the writer of Ecclesiastes reminds me of an old rabbinical story about a man who went for a walk in the forest. After walking for a while, he got hopelessly lost. He wandered around for hours, going down one path and then the other, but none of them led out of the forest. Then abruptly, he came across another hiker walking through the forest. He cried out, “Thank God for another human being. Can you show me the path that leads back to town?” The other man replied, “No, I’m lost too. But we can help each other in this way. We can tell each other which paths we have walked down that led nowhere, and through the process of elimination, we can figure out the path that leads home.”

That’s exactly what the writer of Ecclesiastes does early in his book. He begins by telling us that the path of pleasure, the path of possessions, and the path of production are not the secrets of life. But thankfully, Ecclesiastes not only tells us the wrong paths to the good life; he also shares some right ones. We’ll explore those in the following lessons. But for today it’s enough to see the wrong ones.

LESSON 1 DISCUSSION GUIDE

Avoid the Wrong Paths
Ecclesiastes 2:1–11

NOTE: A week before the class meets, ask members to read Lesson 1.

Ask someone to quickly summarize “The Path of Pleasure” section above.

Read the following text:

Then ask the following questions.

Do you agree that the path of pleasure is ultimately inadequate for a meaningful life? Why or why not?
What are some wholesome pleasures?
What “pleasures” do you think are destructive?
Are Christians too negative about enjoying the pleasures of life? For example, historically, the church has mostly been negative about sex, rather than affirming it as a good gift from God. Why do you think people of faith have been so suspicious about pleasure, especially bodily pleasures?

Ask someone to quickly summarize the “The Path of Possessions.”

Read the following text:

“I also had great possessions of herds and flocks, more than any who had been before me in Jerusalem. I also gathered for myself silver and gold and the treasure of kings” (2:7–8 NRSV).

Then ask the following questions.

How important are possessions when it comes to living a good life? Why do you feel that way?
What possessions are essential?
What possessions are nonessential?
Can possessions be harmful?
Why do you think Americans are so consumed with materialism?

Ask someone to quickly summarize the “The Path of Production.”

Read the following text:

“I made great works. . . . I became great and surpassed all who were before me in Jerusalem” (Eccl. 2:4, 9 NRSV).

Then ask the following questions:

The lesson says that “production is probably the most popular path people in America follow to find contentment.” Do you agree with that statement? Why or why not?
Why do you think career success is so important in American culture?
What are the strengths of careerism?
What are the weaknesses of careerism?
Do you resonate with these three “wrong” paths of pleasure, possessions, and production? Can you think of other “wrong” paths people follow in the pursuit of meaning and happiness?

LESSON 2 — Live Fully in the Present Moment
Ecclesiastes 9:3–10

In today’s text Ecclesiastes lays out an important ingredient for living a good life. However, in keeping with the writer’s overall cynical tone, Ecclesiastes begins on a negative note before moving to a positive one, as we see in the following text:

“This is the evil in everything that happens under the sun: The same destiny overtakes all. . . . For the living know that they will die. . . . Never again will they have a part in anything that happens under the sun” (Eccl. 9:3, 5–6 NIV).

Isn’t that a heartwarming passage of Scripture! I think you should put it on your bathroom mirror and read it every morning for inspiration!

Midlife Crisis

Ecclesiastes’s funk about growing old and dying reminds me of the classic movie City Slickers. The main character in City Slickers was a man named Mitch. Mitch, like the writer of Ecclesiastes, had a great life. He had an incredible wife, two great kids, several close friends, a nice house, and a good job. In spite of his wonderful life, Mitch was in a midlife funk. Instead of enjoying the many good things in his life, Mitch, like the writer of Ecclesiastes, worried about growing old.

In one of the scenes from the movie, Mitch goes to his son’s grade-school class for career day. His assignment was to talk about his job at a local radio station. But instead, he digressed into his midlife crisis. He said to the children:

Value this time in your life, kids. This is the time in your life when you have choices. It goes by so fast. When you are a teenager, you think that you can do anything, and you do. Your twenties are a blur. In your thirties you make a little money, raise a family, and wonder, “What happened to my twenties?” In your forties, you grow a pot belly and another chin. The music starts to get too loud and one of your old girlfriends becomes a grandmother. In your fifties, you have a minor surgery—you call it a “procedure.” In your sixties, you have a major surgery and the music is still loud but that doesn’t matter because you can no longer hear it. In your seventies, you and the wife move to Florida and you start having dinner at 2 in the afternoon, lunch at 10 in the morning, and breakfast the night before. You spend most of your time wandering around malls looking for the ultimate low-fat yogurt and muttering, “How come the kids don’t call?” In your eighties you have a major stroke and end up babbling to a Jamaican nurse whom your wife can’t stand, but who you end up calling, “Momma.” Any questions?

(If you have projection capabilities, you’ll want to show this wonderful clip. You can find it under chapter 3, minutes 16:49 to 17:58.)

Thankfully, by the end of the movie, Mitch worked through his midlife crisis. He quit dwelling on growing old and dying, and he began to enjoy his life again. The same thing happened with the writer of Ecclesiastes. Ecclesiastes finally realized, since life is short, I better enjoy the journey while I still have time. So right after he says we are all going to die, he immediately adds:

“Go, eat your food with gladness, and drink your wine with a joyful heart, for it is now that God favors what you do” (9:7 NIV).

Live in the Present Moment

In this text Ecclesiastes tells us that one of the secrets of life is to live fully in the present moment, before our time is gone. This is not the most important theme in the book of Ecclesiastes. Nor it is a major theme in the Bible. But it’s an important insight. If we want to have a good life, we must learn to live in the present moment. A lot of people today call this practicing “mindfulness.”

I know this isn’t new. We’ve heard it a million times before. But few people do it. Instead, most people tend to focus on the past or on the future. When we focus too much on the past or the future, it robs us of the present, which is all we have. So, Ecclesiastes says, live fully in the present moment while you still have life and breath. Death will arrive soon, so live today while you have the opportunity. Thankfully, Ecclesiastes doesn’t just tell us to live in the present moment, but the writer also gives us four practical suggestions for doing so.

Ecclesiastes’s first suggestion for living fully in the present moment is to appreciate the simple gifts. We see that in verse 7, “Go, eat your food with gladness, and drink your wine with a joyful heart” (Eccl. 9:7 NIV).

To live in the present moment, we must appreciate the simple gifts. Lunch with a friend. A beautiful sunset. An engaging novel. A creative movie. A walk in the park. The beauty of spring. A game of catch with your kids. Intimacy with your spouse. Dinner around the table with family and friends. Grandkids coming to your house. Grandkids leaving your house! A beautiful song. A funny joke. A glass of strong, sweet, Southern iced tea. To truly live we must focus on the simple gifts of life and be grateful for them.
Ecclesiastes’s second suggestion for living fully in the present moment is to remember to celebrate. We see that in verse 8, “Always be clothed in white, and always anoint your head with oil” (Eccl. 9:8 NIV).

White garments and oil were ancient symbols of festivity and celebration. Ecclesiastes is telling us to celebrate life, to have some fun, to have a party or two. That’s the advice of a doctor named Bernie Siegel. He said, “I’ve done the research and I hate to tell you, but everybody dies—lovers, joggers, vegetarians, and nonsmokers. I’m telling you this so that some of you who jog at 5 a.m. and eat vegetables will occasionally sleep late and have an ice cream cone.”
Ecclesiastes’s third suggestion for living fully in the present moment is to enjoy your relationships. We see that in verse 9, “Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love” (Eccl. 9:9 NIV).

I know relationships can be complicated and strained and painful sometimes. But other than our faith, the people in our lives are the most important part of our lives. So Ecclesiastes says to enjoy our relationships—not only with our spouse but also with family, friends, coworkers, neighbors, and church family. We’ll look at this more carefully in the next lesson.
Ecclesiastes’s final suggestion for living in the present moment is to work with enthusiasm. “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might” (Eccl. 9:10 NIV).

Ecclesiastes tells us to throw ourselves into our work with all our might. Whatever work we do—whether at school, at home, at the office, or at church—Ecclesiastes tells us to dive in and enjoy it.

According to Ecclesiastes, one of the secrets of life is living fully in the present moment. Of course, that does NOT mean we won’t have trials and struggles and tears along the way. Of course we will. But in spite of the struggles, God wants us to appreciate and enjoy the incredible gift of being alive. Even in the hard times, God wants us to enjoy the journey. How can we do that? Today’s text is a good starting point. According to Ecclesiastes, we can live fully in the present moment by following these four strategies:

Appreciate the simple gifts.
Remember to celebrate.
Enjoy your relationships.
Work with enthusiasm.

The Best Time of My Life

I want to conclude today’s lesson by sharing one of my all-time favorite essays, written by Joe Kemp. It’s called “The Best Time of My Life.”

It was June 15, and in two days I would be turning thirty. I was insecure about entering a new decade of my life and feared that my best years were now behind me.

My daily routine included going to the gym for a workout before going to work. Every morning I would see my friend Nicholas at the gym. He was 79 years old and in terrific shape. As I greeted Nicholas on this particular day, he noticed I wasn’t full of my usual vitality and asked if there was anything wrong. I told him I was feeling anxious about turning thirty. I wondered how I would look back on my life once I reached Nicholas’s age, so I asked him, “What was the best time of your life?”

Without hesitation, Nicholas replied, “Well, Joe, this is my philosophical answer to your philosophical question:

“When I was a child in Austria and everything was taken care of for me and I was nurtured by my parents, that was the best time of my life.

“When I was going to school and learning the things I know today, that was the best time of my life.

“When I got my first job and had responsibilities and got paid for my efforts, that was the best time of my life.

“When I met my wife and fell in love, that was the best time of my life.

“The Second World War came, and my wife and I had to flee Austria to save our lives. When we were together and safe on a ship bound for North America, that was the best time of my life.

“When I was a young father, watching my children grow up, that was the best time of my life.

“And now, Joe, I am 79 years old. I have my health, I feel good and I am in love with my wife just as I was when we first met. This is the best time of my life.”

LESSON 2 DISCUSSION GUIDE

Live Fully in the Present Moment
Ecclesiastes 9:3–10

NOTE: A week before the class meets, ask members to read Lesson 2.

Begin the class with the scene from the classic film City Slickers. If possible, show the video clip mentioned in the lesson. If not, have someone set up and then read Mitch’s monologue (you can find it in the introduction of lesson 2, as seen above).

Note that Mitch’s depressing monologue is the same spirit we find in Ecclesiastes 9. Read the following text:

Note that Ecclesiastes doesn’t conclude his comments about death by saying we are all going to die. Instead, he adds that the reality of death needs to motivate us to live fully in the present moment, while we are still alive.

Have someone read the first two paragraphs under the subtitle “Living in the Present Moment” in lesson 2.

Then have the class review the four practical suggestions Ecclesiastes offers for living in the present moment.

Enlist someone to read number 1, “Appreciate the simple gifts.” Ask members, “What are the simple gifts of life that you appreciate?” Note that the more specific they can be, the better. After people respond, ask them, “How can we better appreciate the simple gifts of life?” For example, you could mention that a lot of people keep a gratitude journal where they list the good gifts of that day they want to be thankful for.

Ask someone to read number 2, “Remember to celebrate.” Ask the class, “How can we better celebrate the joys of life?”

Invite someone to read number 3, “Enjoy your relationships.” Note that since this will be the focus of next week’s lesson; we’ll wait until then to explore it further.

Call on someone to read number 4, “Work with enthusiasm.” Ask the group, “What are some practical ways we can work with more gusto and enthusiasm in our jobs (at home, school, the workplace, or volunteer work)?”

Ask a member of the class to read the essay, “The Best Time of my Life” (see the conclusion of lesson 2). Ask the class to respond to the reading.

LESSON 3 — Prioritize Relationships
Ecclesiastes 4:7–12

In Ecclesiastes 4, the writer lays out the key essential for living a good life. However, in keeping with his overall pessimistic and cynical tone, the writer of Ecclesiastes begins on a negative note before he moves to a positive one. We see that in the following verses:

“Again, I saw vanity under the sun: the case of solitary individuals, without sons or brothers; yet there is no end to all their toil, and their eyes are never satisfied with riches. ‘For whom am I toiling,’ they ask, ‘and depriving myself of pleasure?’ This also is vanity and an unhappy business” (Eccl. 4:7–8 NRSV).

Unhappy Business

What a sad passage. Ecclesiastes speaks here about people who work hard, make good money, but have no meaningful relationships. They are all alone; they are “solitary individuals.”

I heard about one of these solitary individuals a few years ago. A hospital chaplain was working at the emergency room one night when a woman was brought to the ER by ambulance. She and her husband had been eating dinner at a restaurant, and while she was eating, she suffered a heart attack and was rushed to the hospital. While the doctors worked with the woman, the chaplain stayed with her husband, trying to support him during this scary time.

A few minutes later a doctor approached the man and the chaplain and announced that, in spite of their best work, the man’s wife had died. The doctor handed the chaplain an envelope that contained the woman’s wedding ring, necklace, and eyeglasses. Obviously, the man was stunned with grief.

After a few minutes together, the chaplain offered to call the man’s pastor. The man did not have a pastor because he and his wife did not attend church. The chaplain asked if he could call a family member to come take him home, but the man explained that his family was scattered across the country, living hundreds of miles away. The chaplain asked if he could call a coworker to be with him, but the man said he had retired several years earlier and had no work relationships anymore. The chaplain said to the man, “What about a neighbor? Can I call one of your neighbors to come and take you home?” The man replied that he and his wife did not know any of their neighbors in their apartment complex.

The chaplain helped the man with the hospital paperwork, then offered a prayer for him. He handed the man the envelope that contained his wife’s jewelry and glasses and escorted him to the hospital exit. And then the chaplain watched the man walk away, all alone, to cope with his wife’s death.

As tragic as that story is, it’s not an isolated event. Sadly, America is full of “solitary individuals.” In fact, in recent years, there’s been a lot of discussion about an “epidemic of loneliness” in America. Why is that?

At least three factors contribute to the rampant loneliness found in America. First, we live in a culture of radical individualism. In our effort to lift up the individual, we have lost much of the communal and relational aspect of human life. Second, we live in a culture of extreme mobility. People in American move a lot, cutting themselves off from their family and friends. Third, we live in a culture of intense competition. It’s hard to be intimate and close to people when you are in competition with them.

In today’s text the writer of Ecclesiastes talks about “solitary individuals,” people who lack significant relationships in their lives, people who are all alone. And he says: “This is not the way God intended life to be. People are not meant to live their lives as solitary individuals. Hard work and financial success are no substitute for being connected to other human beings.”

Ecclesiastes claims that it makes no sense to toil away at work and miss out on relationships. That, says Ecclesiastes, is “unhappy business.” Although he comes at it from a negative point of view, Ecclesiastes is saying that one of the primary keys to contentment is being connected with other persons. Although he says that negatively in verses 7–8, he says it positively in verse 9–12.

Two are Better than One

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Eccl. 4:9–12 NIV).

Although this passage is often read at weddings, it’s actually about relationships in general. Ecclesiastes is affirming that if we want to live a good life, we must highly value the people in our lives. “Two,” says Ecclesiastes, “are better than one.”

Ecclesiastes then points out some of the benefits of connecting with others. In verse 10 he says that relationships give us support when we fall. And we fall a lot. In verse 11 he says that relationships give us warmth. That’s not just true physically but also emotionally. Our lives are warmed by having relationships with others. In verse 12 he says that relationships give us strength for facing life’s battles. Life is a battleground, we are often attacked, and family and friends help us fight and win those battles.

In short, Ecclesiastes says, if we want a meaningful and contented life, then we must prioritize relationships. Of course, doing so takes a lot of effort. Maintaining good relationships with family, friends, coworkers, and fellow church members is hard work. It takes a lot of time and effort and energy to prioritize the relationships in our life. Relationships are often messy. They require enormous effort to maintain. But, in the end, relationships, with God and with others, are what matters most.

When we get to the end of our life, it’s not going to matter how big our stocks and bonds portfolio is, or how many diplomas hang on the wall, or how many career awards we won. No, when we get to the end of our life, what’s going to matter is our relationships with other people and our relationship with God. As Ecclesiastes says near the end of his book, “Remember your Creator” (12:1 NIV).

One of my favorite authors is a rabbi named Harold Kushner. His book on Ecclesiastes, When All You’ve Ever Wanted Isn’t Enough inspired this series and provided several of the stories. In the book, Kushner tells a story about going to the beach for vacation. He was sitting on the beach one summer day, watching two children playing in the sand. They were hard at work building an elaborate sandcastle by the water’s edge, with gates and towers and moats and internal passages. Just when they had nearly finished their project, a big wave came along and knocked it down, reducing it to a heap of wet sand.

He expected the children to burst into tears, devastated by what had happened to all their hard work. But they surprised him. Instead of crying, they held each other’s hand, laughed a big belly laugh, and sat down to build another castle. Rabbi Kushner said he learned an important lesson from those children that day. All the things in our lives, all the complicated structures we spent so much time and energy creating, are built on sand. Sooner or later a wave will come along and knock down what we have worked so hard to build up. And when that happens, only the person who has somebody’s hand to hold will be able to laugh and rebuild.

LESSON 3 DISCUSSION GUIDE

Prioritize Relationships
Ecclesiastes 4:7–12

NOTE: A week before the class meets, ask members to read Lesson 3.

To introduce today’s lesson, read the opening paragraph in lesson 3. Then have someone in the class read the following text from Ecclesiastes 4 in paragraph 2:

Note that in this text, Ecclesiastes speaks about “solitary individuals.” He’s speaking about people who are disconnected from others and calls it “unhappy business.” In recent years we’ve been hearing a lot of talk about an “epidemic of loneliness” in America. Do you think that is true? If so, why do you think that is the case?

Allow time for class members to respond to the above questions. Then note that the lesson lists three factors that contribute to the rampant loneliness found in America. Review and briefly discuss these factors:

First, we live in a culture of radical individualism. In our effort to lift up the individual, we have lost much of the communal and relational aspects of human life.
Second, we live in a culture of extreme mobility. People in American move a lot, cutting themselves off from their family and friends.
Third, we live in a culture of intense competition. It’s hard to be intimate and close to people when you are in competition with them.

Mention that while Ecclesiastes begins on a negative note, he then speaks positively about the benefits of relationships. Have someone read the following text:

Note that this passage lists three benefits of relationships with others:

Relationships support us when we fall (v. 10).
Relationships give us warmth—both physical and emotional (v. 11).
Relationships give us strength for life’s battles (v. 12).

Ask members of the class to share experiences when these things proved true in their lives. In short, ask them to talk about how relationships enhance their life.

Enlist someone to read the following two paragraphs from lesson 3:

Ask the group:

How can we strengthen our relationships with other people?

How can we strengthen our relationship with God?

Near the end of the class consider doing one of the following two options:

Ask someone to tell (or read) the concluding story in lesson 3 about the sandcastle.

Or listen to the song from Wicked called “For Good” (most anyone with a cell phone could look it up and play the song). It would enhance the experience to run off the lyrics of the song for each class member (in advance) so they could follow along during the song.

Ask members to respond to the story or the song (or both if time permits).

Series Studies

A Cynics Search for the Secrets of Life: Life’s Lessons from the Book of Ecclesiastes (3 Weeks Series)

Lesson 1 – Avoid the Wrong Paths Ecclesiastes 2:1–11

LESSON 1 DISCUSSION GUIDE

Avoid the Wrong Paths Ecclesiastes 2:1–11

LESSON 2 — Live Fully in the Present Moment Ecclesiastes 9:3–10

LESSON 2 DISCUSSION GUIDE

Live Fully in the Present Moment Ecclesiastes 9:3–10

LESSON 3 — Prioritize Relationships Ecclesiastes 4:7–12

LESSON 3 DISCUSSION GUIDE

Prioritize Relationships Ecclesiastes 4:7–12

"Lord I believe; help my unbelief" (Mark 9:24)

A Cynics Search for the Secrets of Life: Life’s Lessons from the Book of Ecclesiastes
(3 Weeks Series)

Lesson 1 – Avoid the Wrong Paths
Ecclesiastes 2:1–11

Avoid the Wrong Paths
Ecclesiastes 2:1–11

LESSON 2 — Live Fully in the Present Moment
Ecclesiastes 9:3–10

Live Fully in the Present Moment
Ecclesiastes 9:3–10

LESSON 3 — Prioritize Relationships
Ecclesiastes 4:7–12

Prioritize Relationships
Ecclesiastes 4:7–12